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Sex education by teens, for teens. Sex, Etc. is published by Answer.

September 15, 2014 2:30 pm

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9:51 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: Is pillow humping a weird form of masturbation for a female? Its the only way i can get off but i want to be able to experience this same pleasure through fingering but i cant seem to get the same experience

Hi anon,

Rubbing the genitals against something is a way to masturbate that lots of people engage in and is completely normal. We just suggest only doing it against your things, like say your pillow, since most people wouldn’t want to touch or use something someone else had put their genitals on.

Lots of people masturbate by rubbing the clitoris, with their fingers, against a pillow or some other way. Inserting the fingers into the vagina, or fingering, can feel good for some people and they may experience an orgasm from this, though it’s less common than through clitoral stimulation.

I hope this helps.


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9:41 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: Hi guys, i just have a quick question that probably seems a bit silly but oh well, my mum is taking me to the doctors to go on the pill to, what she thinks is to stop my irregular periods but i exaggerated a little about my irregular periods cos i want to go on the pill as a form of contraceptive but my mum is a conservative parent against sex for teens and she wouldnt agree to the real reasoning, so my question is will the doctor be able to check if my periods are actually irregular or not?

Hi anon,

Health care providers can’t look at someone and know if they have irregular periods or not, they’ll probably ask you about your periods and then based on what you describe will diagnose you with irregular periods or not.

It’s recommended that health care providers talk to teens alone for a few minutes so they have privacy away from their parents and can talk openly about issues like this. If you have time alone with your doctor you have a right to ask for the pill, regardless of if you have irregular periods or you just want to prevent pregnancy, and they should respect your privacy. You have a right to access hormonal birth control without your parents permission since you are legally able to consent to medical treatment which includes birth control.

I hope this helps.


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9:37 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: When I try to masturbate it doesn't feel that good and I have never had an orgasm before. Yes, I am a virgin but I'm still not sure if this is something to be worried about.

Hi anon,

Masturbation is a good way to learn about your body and your sexual feelings. Touching your own body for sexual pleasure is different for everyone. How you do it depends on what makes your body feel good. Some people may stroke or rub their penis or may use their fingers to touch themselves on or near the clitoris, the sensitive organ that is located just above the opening of the vagina. Masturbation sometimes results in orgasm; sometimes it doesn’t. This is completely normal. You may still be learning what feels good for your body, this is also normal. It can take a while to figure out what might result in an orgasm.

If you are concerned though that something medical may be going on, then speaking with a health care provider can be helpful.

I hope this helps.


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September 12, 2014 4:00 pm
Make a Difference - Sex, Etc.

It’s Take Action Friday! How will you make a difference in the world today?


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September 10, 2014 4:00 pm
Got questions? Ask us!

Are you a teen with a question about sex, sexuality or sexual health? Then ask our expert!

You can also post in the Forums on Sexetc.org and get expert advice and talk to other teens about what you’re going through!


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September 9, 2014 9:57 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: Hi, i haven't given a bj yet but plan on giving one to my boyfriend but i am just so nervous i will accidentally scrape him with my teeth and i don't want to hurt him, any advice?

Hi anon,

It’s normal to be nervous a little before engaging in a sexual behavior for the first time. If you are more than a little nervous though, it could be a sign that you aren’t ready to be engaging in a particular behavior—just something to think about.

One way to be less nervous is to talk to your partner. Tell him your concerns and also ask him what he likes and dislikes. He can also tell you while it is happening. You can also do the same for him and tell him what you like and dislike. Good communication before, during and after sexual behaviors can go a long way to making sure that everyone feels comfortable and that they are enjoying engaging in these behaviors.

Also, something you may want to discuss with your partner is how you will practice safer sex when engaging in oral sex. Oral sex can transmit STDs so if you’ll be performing oral sex on your partner you’ll want to consider using a condom. You and your partner might also want to consider getting tested together first at a local free or low-cost and confidential clinic.

I hope this helps.


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September 8, 2014 2:30 pm

askerquestioner

Anonymous: My boyfriend finds my blowjob skills to be lacking. Also I lack libido despite being a guy who watches so much porn. How do we make our sex lives more passionate?

Hi anon,

The best way to find out what a partner likes sexually is to communicate. You and he might want to talk at a time when you two aren’t doing anything, like just watching a movie or going for a walk. You can tell him what you like and dislike when it comes to oral sex or other behaviors and he can tell you the same. Communicating before, during and after engaging in sexual behaviors can help you two get to know what each other likes and what feels good for each other. (You might also discuss safer sex and how to prevent the transmission of STDs by using condoms for oral sex if you don’t already.)

Porn, as a note, is illegal for teens under 18 to access. We know teens watch porn, but we also know that watching porn can give unrealistic expectations about sex, sexual health and sexuality. For instance, porn might make it seem like people are having sex everyday, several times a day when lots of partners might have sex a couple of times a week, lots may have more, some may have less and some partners aren’t having sex at all and that’s all normal. There’s no “right” amount to have sex with a partner—the only right amount is what is right for you and him. Sometimes watching a lot of porn can actually affect how often someone wants to have sex with their partner. If watching pornography is interfering with your daily life or relationships, then you may want to talk to a trusted adult about what’s going on.

If you and your partner want to engage in sexual behaviors more, or in ways that are more enjoyable for you two, then communicating about boundaries, likes and dislikes, comfort and discomfort and what you two would like for your sexual behaviors to be like is probably the first step. Knowing you and your partner are on the same page can go along way.

I hope this helps.


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1:27 pm

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8:32 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: are social and bodily disphoria 2 different things for trans people, and do trans people experience one or both of those things usually? i feel like i'm comfortable with my feminine-looking body but i behave and feel masculine and if i ever considered taking T or anything it would be to avoid situations where i'm read& treated as a girl, not because i don't feel comfortable with a feminine body. i'm not sure if i should identify as trans & i'd really love to hear trans people's opinions on this.

Hi anon,

Every person is different and every person who is trans is different. Some people who are transgender feel their sex and gender assigned at birth do not match their gender identity. Gender identity is how one feels as a person who masculine, feminine, a combination of both or neither. It sounds like you are expressing comfort with your female body, but your gender identity leans masculine. That’s perfectly OK and normal if that is how you identify. Only you can decide if you are or identify as transgender.

If you are interested in learning more about trans issues, want to access more resources and support and possibly connect with other youth who are trans, you might want to check out TransYouth Family Allies.

I hope this helps.


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September 5, 2014 4:01 pm
Make a Difference - Sex, Etc.

It’s take Action Friday! Summer break might be over, but your chance to affect change isn’t!


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8:12 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: How soon is the skyla IUD effective if it's at the end of my cycle but right before my next period

Hi anon,

According to the Skyla website, if the Skyla IUD is inserted during the first week of your menstrual cycle—during your period basically—it is effective at preventing pregnancy at the time of insertion and no back up method of birth control is necessary to prevent pregnancy. But, of course, Skyla doesn’t prevent the transmission of STDs, so using a condom if you plan to have penile-vaginal sex is still a good idea.

I hope this helps!


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September 4, 2014 11:14 am
Sweet! The new issue of @sexetc magazine is here! #sexed #education #sexualhealth #health #sexuality #teens  (at Answer)

Sweet! The new issue of @sexetc magazine is here! #sexed #education #sexualhealth #health #sexuality #teens (at Answer)


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10:55 am

askerquestioner

Anonymous: Thank you!!!

Not a problem, we love answering questions from teens! We want you to know we appreciate your thanks!

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